Christoph stopped in front of Richard’s door, his eyes fixed on the doorknob. Just as he was about to reach out, the door suddenly opened.

His hand froze mid-air, startled by the unexpected movement. The person stepping out was Hans. Hans, too, seemed surprised to find someone standing right outside the door and quickly looked up.

“Oh, Christoph! You almost gave me a heart attack. Why are you just standing here instead of going in?”

“I was just about to go in. And you? Done with work for the day?”

Christoph glanced at Hans, who was holding a laptop and a stack of documents. Hans nodded.

“Yeah, at least today’s work is done. Richard’s still going over a few things, though. But hey, why are you still here? Oh, right, I guess you couldn’t leave.”

Hans trailed off, adding the last part as if muttering to himself. He nodded as though he’d just realized something, which made Christoph frown.

“And why wouldn’t I be able to leave?” 

“Well…… uh…… I mean, it’s snowing…… never mind, just go in.” 

Hans stammered, clearly flustered. He quickly covered it up and turned to bid Christoph goodbye. “Alright then, take care, Christoph.”  And with that, Hans hurried off, his brisk steps making it clear he still had plenty to do. 

Christoph watched Hans’s retreating figure with a puzzled look before turning back to the still-open door. After a brief hesitation, he stepped inside.

The moment he crossed the threshold, his eyes took in the expansive office space. A large desk, towering bookshelves, a few sets of sofas accompanied by small tables, and potted plants scattered around the room created an environment that was both orderly and inviting. To the left, a door led to a bedroom with a walk-in closet and an en-suite bathroom.

Typically, on a Sunday evening, Richard would be in the bedroom relaxing. But Christoph didn’t have to look far, he spotted Richard sitting at the desk, with his screen lit up and a pile of documents scattered around. As Christoph entered, their eyes met briefly. Richard raised an eyebrow slightly before lowering his gaze back to the laptop. Without looking up again, he spoke:

“Were you in the lobby of The West Wing the whole time?”

“Yeah.”

“With…… never mind, doesn’t matter.”

Richard seemed about to ask something else but clicked his tongue and stopped mid-sentence. Christoph stood silently in the middle of the room, caught in hesitation.

The feeling was suffocating, as if a weight pressed down on his chest, while his head felt ready to burst. He should have just gone back to Berlin from the start.

Standing there, filled with the weight of belated regret, Christoph heard Richard speak: “Sit down.”

Christoph wanted to say: ‘No, it’s fine, I’ll leave now’, but strangely, the words stuck in his throat. After a long moment of silence, he walked forward and sat down on the sofa.

“……I thought you’d be free this weekend.” – Christoph said without meaning to.

Richard hesitated for a moment before replying: “I thought so too. But it couldn’t be helped.”

Not long ago, Richard had mentioned over the phone that after the hectic end-of-year period, he’d finally have a relaxing weekend. But in Tarten, work was never predictable, and this time was no exception.

Christoph frowned slightly as he looked at Richard, who was engrossed in his laptop screen. It seemed Richard didn’t notice his own furrowed brow. However, what caught Christoph’s attention even more was the pale, exhausted look on Richard’s face. Thinking back, it was likely Richard hadn’t had a proper night’s sleep for days.

“You look tired.”

Christoph spoke with a hint of bluntness in his tone. The response he received was detached and indifferent: “It’s just normal.”

The two fell into silence for a long while. A heavy, suffocating silence that made Christoph feel stifled. It was as if the air in the room had thickened, growing more oppressive with each passing moment, slowly choking him. If this continued, he felt like he might lose his mind, so Christoph, forcing himself, opened his mouth and managed to say something:

“I――.”

The moment those words left his mouth, Richard stopped what he was doing, lifted his gaze from the laptop, and looked directly at Christoph. He set the documents in his hands down and turned his full attention to Christoph, his expression signaling: ‘Go ahead. I’m listening.’

Richard waited calmly, yet his demeanor was entirely serious. Christoph met his gaze, his mouth slightly open, but no words came out.

‘What should I say? Where do I even start? I don’t know.’

Christoph was certain he needed to say something to Richard, but the words he needed refused to surface. Perhaps they were simple, perhaps they were easy to say, yet he couldn’t figure out how to express them.

Richard remained silent, patiently waiting. Christoph looked at him, his lips moving faintly, but in the end, his shoulders slumped. His mind was a chaotic mess he couldn’t untangle, and a sudden heat surged in his chest.

“……I’m leaving now.”

Christoph stood up from the sofa, his voice hoarse as he forced out the words. Richard’s brow furrowed slightly, as if tinged with disappointment, but he still didn’t say anything. There was only a soft sigh, so clear that it reached Christoph’s ears like a silent reproach.

“All right. ……Take this with you.”

Hearing Richard’s cold voice made Christoph, who had just turned to leave, stop in his tracks and look back. From the desk drawer, Richard pulled something out and extended it toward him with an indifferent gesture. Christoph instinctively took the item and looked down at it. It was an old book.

“This is something you asked me to find a long time ago. I just got word on it a few days ago, so I managed to track it down. ……It’s ironic to give it to you under these circumstances, but it’s yours regardless. Take it. Once you’re done reading, do whatever you want with it.”

The clicking sound of Richard’s tongue at the end of his sentence echoed sharply in Christoph’s ears. Christoph stared at the book, it was something he had longed for ages ago. A rare, antique edition he had nearly given up on ever finding because of how difficult it was to acquire.

“What’s this supposed to mean?”

Christoph lifted his gaze from the book, looking at Richard with a puzzled expression. Richard, now holding a stack of documents, didn’t lift his eyes from them as he replied nonchalantly:

“You said you wanted to read it.”

Christoph looked back down at the book in his hands. It was something he had deeply desired long ago, only to bury the thought in his memory after giving up hope of finding it. He couldn’t even remember when he had mentioned it to Richard. If he had, it must have been a passing remark or an offhand comment.

“……How did you find it? This book is incredibly rare.”

“One of the places I contacted to notify me if they found anything got in touch. They located the owner in Prague a few days ago, and I went there to get it immediately.”

Christoph looked at Richard with a mix of confusion and an indescribable feeling.

Suddenly, Halt’s words from the previous day flashed through his mind. Halt had mentioned that Richard, in the midst of days so busy he didn’t even have time to sleep, had disappeared into the night and only returned at dawn. Perhaps that trip was――.

“You say you don’t have time to sleep, but you had time to go to Prague for this?”

Christoph’s chest tightened. He knew it wasn’t anger, nor exactly sadness, and it certainly wasn’t joy. Perhaps it was all of those emotions combined, swirling together into an overwhelming wave he couldn’t name.

A moment later, Richard responded, his voice cold, his gaze never once lifting toward Christoph:

“Even if it’s just something that ends when you finish reading it, I don’t know what else could make you happier than this.”

To Richard, this was the only thing that could make Christoph show his most genuine, happiest expression. That was the sole reason. Just to see that radiant face, even once.

‘What should I do? I need to say something. I can’t just stay silent like this.’

But those words——like they were stuck in his throat, refused to come out. Christoph could only fidget with the book in his hands, turning it over as if it held the answer to his confusion.

“All right, get ready. It’s getting late.”

Richard glanced at the clock and realized how late it had become. He closed his laptop, stood up, and grabbed his coat. As he prepared to head out, he muttered under his breath: “Leaving in the middle of the night, with snow falling like this……” Richard clicked his tongue in irritation. He turned back and asked, in an offhanded tone:

“Do you want me to drive?”

In moments like this, it was clear Richard couldn’t feel at ease thinking of Christoph driving back to Berlin in this state. If Christoph had nodded, Richard would undoubtedly have done it. He’d spend over two hours driving to Berlin and another two hours returning to Dresden without a second thought.

No matter how angry or hurt Richard might have been because of Christoph, he would still do it.

Christoph stood in silence, staring at Richard.

‘What should I do?’

The book in Christoph’s hands suddenly felt heavier than ever. Its weight pressed down on his heart, leaving him breathless.

‘What should I do? What am I supposed to do? Should I just go home like this?—No, absolutely not. I can’t.’

Christoph felt lost, even powerless. He had never experienced such awkwardness until he met this man. He didn’t know how to escape the stifling feeling in his chest, nor did he know how to ease Richard’s anger.

But still……

No matter what, he wanted Richard to be less upset, to have his unpleasant feelings soothed. Christoph didn’t want to leave Richard here in such a state. He wanted Richard to end the day on a lighter note and start the new week in a better mood.

‘……But how?’

Christoph stood silently, unable to utter a word. Richard, after watching him for a moment, stepped closer, reached into Christoph’s coat pocket, and pulled out the car keys. “Let’s go” –  Richard said, then turned and began walking toward the door.

But as he neared the exit, Richard glanced back and noticed that Christoph was still standing there, rooted to the spot as if frozen in place. Raising an eyebrow, Richard’s expression clearly showed his confusion:

“Christoph?”

Christoph stood there, silently looking at him. Then, he reached out his hand.

Seeing Christoph’s expression, laced with frustration, made Richard click his tongue in what sounded like a sigh. He stepped back toward Christoph and placed the car keys into his outstretched hand. For a moment, Richard’s face hardened, as though he assumed Christoph didn’t want him to drive.

‘No, that’s not it. You idiot. That’s not it.’

A wave of urgency surged within Christoph, but he couldn’t find the words to explain. As Richard’s hand released the keys into his palm, Christoph suddenly tightened his grip on Richard’s hand.

Richard looked at him again, this time with clear curiosity. Christoph pulled Richard’s hand closer. There was a slight hesitation, but then Christoph lowered his head and pressed soft kisses onto Richard’s knuckles.

Despite the annoyed look still lingering on Christoph’s face, his actions were incredibly gentle. Carefully, he placed his lips on Richard’s knuckles, the tips of his fingers, as though afraid of hurting him.

“――.”

Richard said nothing. He simply stood there, letting Christoph do as he wished, his eyes fixed intently on every movement Christoph made, as if searching for something.

Christoph didn’t dare lift his head. He avoided Richard’s gaze, keeping his eyes downcast as he placed another one or two soft kisses on Richard’s hand. A burning heat crept up from his neck to his face.

“You’ve gotten sly, Chris.”

Richard’s deep, steady voice broke the silence. His tone was indifferent, almost scolding, yet tinged with a faint sigh of helplessness. His expression betrayed a mix of awkwardness and subtle relief. Christoph didn’t reply; instead, he continued to press gentle kisses onto Richard’s knuckles.

“Clever, aren’t you? You’re reminding me that you’re the one in control here, aren’t you?”

A nearly resigned sigh brushed over Christoph’s head. Then, Richard pulled his hand away.

When Christoph raised his head and looked at Richard with uncertainty, Richard remained silent for a moment. Then, he turned and casually tossed the car keys over his shoulder. The keys landed somewhere on the far side of the desk with a faint clinking sound.

“Let’s postpone driving you back by a few hours.”